LAUGH…SMILE…LIVE*……JOKES*

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LAUGH WITH DORAZ

I believe that LAUGHTER IS THE BEST MEDICINE. I believe that a SMILE a day helps. I have set up a collection of some of my favorites on this blog. Take some time to enjoy some of them. Be sure to SMILE. A while ago, I combined my two blogs. Now you can also see my collection at…..

DORAZ SAYS

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Luisa Doraz

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School jokes I found……..

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Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Dewey.
Dewey who?
Dewey have to go to school today?

Have you heard about the teacher who was cross-eyed?
She couldn’t control her pupils!

Teacher: Name two days of the week that start with “t”.
Pupil: Today and Tomorrow.

What school supply is always tired?
A knapsack!

Teacher: I see you missed the first day of school.
Kid: Yes, but I didn’t miss it much.

Teacher: Could you please pay a little attention?
Student: I’m paying as little attention as I can.

Teacher: James, where is your homework?
James: I ate it.
Teacher: Why?
James: You said it was a piece of cake!

Teacher: Why is your homework in your father’s handwriting?
Pupil: I used his pen!

Teacher: You’ve got your shoes on the wrong feet.
Pupil: But these are the only feet I’ve got!

What’s the difference between a teacher and a steam train?
The first goes “Spit out that chewing gum immediately!” and the second goes “chew chew”!

Today my teacher yelled at me for something I didn’t do.
What was that?
My homework!

What is white when its dirty and black when its clean?
A blackboard!

Teacher: What is the most important thing you have ever learned in chemistry?
Sam: Don’t lick the spoon!

LAUGHTER IS THE BEST MEDICINE*

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PRESIDENT IN 2012

Here we are, already discussing the future President of the United States , beginning with the Year 2012.

For those of you who would like THE VERY BEST choice for President, we have a solution: It is probably time we have a woman as President. One choice is a very special lady who has just about every answer to assist in helping us to solve our problems.

DORAZ SAYS
…. COME ON BY FOR THE LATEST!

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Luisa Doraz

LOT’S OF JOKES….and MORE*

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REMEMBER…. I HAVE MY TWO BLOGS ALL SET UP NOW AT
DORAZ SAYS….SO COME ON BY FOR THE LATEST!

A friend asked a gentleman how it is that he never married? Replied the gentleman, “Well, I guess I just never met the right woman … I guess I’ve been looking for the perfect girl.”
“Oh, come on now,” said the friend, “Surely you have met at least on girl that you wanted to marry.”“Yes, there was one girl .. once. I guess she was the one perfect girl.The only perfect girl I really ever met. She was just the right everything .. I really mean that she was the
perfect girl for me.”“Well, why didn’t you marry her,” asked the friend.“She was looking for the perfect man,” he said.

CHRISTMAS SPIRIT*

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Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.

“In honor of this Holy season,” Saint Peter said, “you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven.”

The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. “It represents a candle,” he said.

“You may pass through the pearly gates,” Saint Peter said.

The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, “they’re bells.

Saint Peter said, “You may pass through the pearly gates.”

The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women’s panties. St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, “And just what do those symbolize?”

The man replied, “These are Carols.”

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REMEMBER…. I HAVE MY TWO BLOGS ALL SET UP NOW AT
DORAZ SAYS….SO COME ON BY FOR THE LATEST!

Saving money on Christmas decorations this year…….

Look at the house on the right.

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An old man gets on a crowded bus and no one gives him a seat. As the bus shakes and rattles, the old man’s cane slips on the floor and he falls.

As he gets up, a seven-year-old kid, sitting nearby, turns to him and says, “If you put a little rubber thingy on the end of your stick, it wouldn’t slip.”

The old man snaps back, “Well, if your daddy did the same thing seven years ago, I would have a seat today.”

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Luisa Doraz

REMEMBER…. I HAVE MY TWO BLOGS ALL SET UP NOW AT
DORAZ SAYS….SO COME ON BY FOR THE LATEST! HAPPY SHOPPING!

CALIFORNIA TURKEY….. CARTOON*

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REMEMBER……I HAVE ALL MY JOKES ON MY OTHER BLOG. COME ON OVER FOR SOME LAUGHS!

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DORAZ SAYS…BELIEVE IN YOURSELF